Ever since the 2011 Chicago Blackhawks went viral with their hilariously cheesy sing-a-long Christmas album sketch, we’ve come to expect the horrible acting and wonderful spirit displayed by NHL teams in the holiday season.
Here’s a rundown of the digital Christmas cards released by NHL clubs this winter.
Team: Boston Bruins
Concept: The Bear & the Gang’s Christmas Spectacular references ’80s sitcoms with a wink, and the intro is as long as the show itself
Highlight: Zdeno Chara hiding creepily behind the Christmas tree
Santa’s rating: Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!
Team: Nashville Predators
Concept: Miming instruments to the tune of Trans-Siberian Orchestra’s “The Lost Christmas Eve” against a Gravity-esque backdrop. Odd.
Highlight: Seth Jones strumming on a guitar with more necks than a turkey farm
Santa’s rating: Ho! Ho!
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Team: Pittsburgh Penguins
Concept: Biting the Blackhawks’ style, the Penguins hock a cornball Christmas CD, A Great Holiday for Hockey Vol. 1, unavailable at thisisafakecd.com.
Highlight: Jokinen plugging “Do Jussi What I See?”
Santa’s rating: Ho! Ho! Ho!
“
Team: San Jose Sharks
Concept: Peering in on the Sharks’ office party for a full six minutes, complete with analysis
Highlight: Brent Burns’ gift-unwrapping style: “He’s all over the place… he’s eating the paper.”
Santa’s rating: Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!
Team: St. Louis Blues
Concept: Taking a hatchet to “Twelve Days of Christmas”
Highlight: Vladimir Tarasenko: “Eleven lessons English!”
Santa’s rating: Ho! Ho! Ho!
Team: Vancouver Canucks
Concept: Players get interviewed about their favourite holiday traditions, gifts
Highlight: Making sure Daniel and Henrik wore matching ugly sweaters for the occasion
Santa’s rating: Ho! Ho!
Team: Washington Capitals
Concept: Alex Ovechkin recruits teammates and ridiculous toy instruments to rock out to “Jingle Bells”
Highlight: Joel Ward absolutely Clarence Clemonsing the stuffing out of that bright pink inflatable saxophone
Santa’s rating: Ho! Ho! Ho!
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