NHL Frozen in Time: Just super saiyan

Blake Wheeler seemed to have done the impossible: scoring the tying goal while the Jets were killing a five-minute major. But then the goal was called back on account of Wheeler being the reason Stalock wiped out.

Tuesday was a night of the absurd in the NHL.

Blake Wheeler sent goalie Alex Stalock flying and then called him out, two pucks went skyward before going in off two different netminders’ backs, while Phil Kessel literally took the head off Cam Ward. Well, his helmet, anyway.

Good thing there are professional photographers out there to embarrass these guys more than they need.

1. Richard Panik

Manspreading

Richard Panik, Anthony Bitetto

(Charles Rex Arbogast/AP)

2. Brock Nelson

If this is Brock Nelson after he scores a goal...

Brock Nelson

(Frank Franklin II/AP)

3. Brenden Dillon

Super Saiyan Dillon

HKN Sharks Jets 20160112

(Trevor Hagan/CP)

4. Joe Pavelski

What goaltending would look like with streamlined pads

HKN Sharks Jets 20160112

(Trevor Hagan/CP)

5. Ben Bishop

Ben's been holding it in since the second intermission

Ben Bishop

(David Zalubowski/AP)

6. Rasmus Ristolainen

When you don't have any arms left to carry your own team

Rasmus Ristolainen, Nino Niederreiter, Chad Johnson

(Ann Heisenfelt/AP)