Trick-or treat, smell my feet,
Give me something good to eat
Not too big, not too small,
Just the size of Montreal’s season-opening winning streak.
For this week’s stock assessment of the National Hockey League, we hand out a specific candy for each of the 30 clubs.
Grab your plastic jack-o-lantern, pull on your Ursula the witch getup and go trick-or-treating through the hockey neighbourhood.
| Rank | Team | Previous | |
| 1 |  |
Yes, they blew a 3-0 lead to the Edmonton Oilers and are enduring a two-game sour patch, but the Canadiens are getting so much offence (3.55 goals per game), they can afford to give Alex Semin a night off here and there. |
1 |
| 2 |  |
Jamie Benn has seven points in his last three games. Will we see our first back-to-back Art Ross champ in 15 years? |
2 |
| 3 |  |
The stingiest team in the league has surrendered an NHL-low 17 goals and sits atop the Central — the toughest division, in one man’s opinion. But those helmets… |
5 |
| 4 |  |
New York has killed 23 straight penalties and rates first overall with a 91.7% successful penalty kill. |
3 |
| 5 |  |
Trigger-happy Colton Parayko is firing shots at a frequency not seen by a rookie since Alex Ovechkin — and Parayko’s a defenceman. This great find has seven points and two game-winners from the back end. |
6 |
| 6 |  |
It took a while for L.A. to realize the regular season had started. Now the Kings are rolling with an NHL-best six-game win streak. Time to re-sign Anze Kopitar, maybe? |
22 |
| 7 |  |
First Star of the Week Evgeny Kuznetsov is leading Washingotn in scoring and proving that Alex Ovechkin doesn’t need to be centred by Nicklas Backstrom for the Caps to succeed. |
4 |
| 8 |  |
Minnesota is a perfect 4-0 at home and has a great record despite a slim plus-3 goal differential. These guys deserve something Wild. |
10 |
| 9 |  |
Of course the Panthers’ leading scorer is Jaromir Jagr, 43 years old and still kicking ass. |
12 |
| 10 |  |
Rookie Oscar Lindberg — not Rick Nash, not Mats Zuccarello, not Derek Stepan, not Chris Kreider — leads the Rangers in goals, with five. |
9 |
| 11 |  |
Goalie Michael Hutchinson made a career-high 45 saves Thursday, a big reason the Jets have now beat the Blackhawks in five of their last seven meetings. |
7 |
| 12 |  |
With the excellent play of kids Jared McCann and Jake Virtanen, all the talk is whether to keep these mint rookies or send them back to junior. |
16 |
| 13 |  |
Dan Bylsma received a standing ovation from players and fans during his return to Pittsburgh Thursday, as people have realized the problem might not have been the coach. Good news is that Phil Kessel’s chemistry with Evgeni Malkin appears better than it was with Sidney Crosby. |
15 |
| 14 |  |
David Krejci is second in the scoring race and the slow-start Bruins have quietly improved to a winning record, taking the heat off Claude Julien. |
21 |
| 15 |  |
Even without their No. 2 centre, the Sharks, lead the league in face-off winning percentage (54.6). |
11 |
| 16 |  |
The champs have fallen to sixth place in their division as No. 1 defenceman Duncan Keith sits on long-term injured reserve. |
17 |
| 17 |  |
The Steven Stamkos line has supplanted the Triplets as Tampa’s most productive unit. Though far from awful, it’s time for Tyler Johnson (0 goals) and his pals to kick it up a notch. |
8 |
| 18 |  |
Talk in the desert has focused on rookies Max Domi and Anthony Duclair, but veteran forwards Martin Hanzal and Mikkel Boedker are enjoying nice comeback years for a franchise still struggling at the gate. |
14 |
| 19 |  |
Ottawa leads the entire Eastern Conference in penalties. |
18 |
| 20 |  |
“When will Connor McDavid get his first NHL point?” has morphed into “Will McDavid make a legit run at the scoring crown?” |
19 |
| 21 |  |
The middling Red Wings have been slammed with injuries to their older guys — Johan Frazen, Brad Richards, Pavel Datsyuk, Mike Green — and look like a team that will be balancing on the brink of the playoff cutoff all season long. |
13 |
| 22 |  |
GM Ray Shero sounds pleasantly surprised that his new club — which is a ways off from legitimate contention —is actually over .500 (5-4-1 as of Friday) and in the middle of the Metropolitan pack. |
24 |
| 23 |  |
Doing a little research, one of the most surprising statistics I came across was this: The Hurricanes rank second overall in shots against (24.8 per game). Unfortunately, the Canes’ offence is the fourth worst. |
28 |
| 24 |  |
Despite bursts of promise, Colorado’s dismal possession has the club — as many predicted — last in their division, yet no one thinks Patrick Roy’s job is in danger and there appears to be little style change in sight. |
23 |
| 25 |  |
The struggling Flyers need more accuracy from their $66-million man, Jakub Voracek, who has zero goals since inking his monster eight-year extension in the summer. Dude is 0 for 40 shots. |
20 |
| 26 |  |
Reality may have sunk in, as the Sabres’ climb out of the basement doesn’t look like it’ll happen this season. Injuries to Evander Kane and Robin Lehner haven’t helped, but Buffalo’s minus-10 goal differential is ugly. |
26 |
| 27 |  |
Mike Babcock has improved the club’s work ethic, line juggling and defensive structure, but actual wins… well, they’re still a few years away. |
27 |
| 28 |  |
Since bringing in John Tortorella, the previously-winless Blue Jackets now have a couple W’s, despite the ill health of stars Ryan Johansen and now Brandon Saad. |
30 |
| 29 |  |
As the Corsi crowd predicted, the Flames have come back down to earth. And the goaltending has been abysmal. |
29 |
| 30 |  |
Hard to comprehend just how awful this Anaheim team has been. Feel free to score a goal anytime, Corey Perry. Only to keep from crying… |
25 |
